“I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 13:34-35).
These words were part of the Gospel reading on a recent Sunday. As I proclaimed these words to the congregation, it struck me that this quote was the heart of the Christian message and morality. Indeed, Christ sets it up as the “gold standard” for being a Christian. We can be a member of a Church, but it doesn’t mean that we are a disciple of Jesus Christ. We can give millions to charity, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that we are a disciple of Jesus Christ. We can get every brand of clergy to pray over us and bless us, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that we are a disciple of Jesus Christ. The only real way to be sure someone is a disciple of Jesus Christ is by the quality of their love.
This teaching is so central to the Gospels because “God is love” (1 John 4:8). If we are to be imitators of Jesus, then our lives must reflect divine love. We are made in the image and likeness of God; which means that we are made in the image and likeness of love. If we are true to our nature than we must radiate love. To encounter a disciple of Jesus Christ should be an encounter with the master, which essentially is an encounter with love.
The word “love” evokes warm and fuzzy feeling within us but what does it mean? What is it that someone sees when they encounter a disciple of Jesus Christ? How do we keep this commandment? What does it mean to love?
Paul attempts an answer, not through any lecture on the topic, but through a hymn that he shares in his first letter to the Christians of Corinth. He explains (1 Cor. 13) …
If I speak in human and angelic tongues but do not have love, I am a resounding gong or a clashing cymbal. And if I have the gift of prophecy and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge; if I have all faith so as to move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away everything I own, and if I hand my body over so that I may boast but do not have love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, [love] is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing; if tongues, they will cease; if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing. For we know partially and we prophesy partially, but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. When I was a child, I used to talk as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I became a man, I put aside childish things. At present we see indistinctly, as in a mirror, but then face to face. At present I know partially; then I shall know fully, as I am fully known. So faith, hope, love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
The image of love that emerges is not one of soaring feelings but rather of patient commitment to the relationship, a commitment that can endure suffering and will require humility and mutual service. The apostle James develops this theme even more when he challenges the Christian community to take their faith seriously and act on their faith in a manner like Paul’s description of love.
Was not Abraham our father justified by works when he offered his son Isaac upon the altar? You see that faith was active along with his works, and faith was completed by the works. Thus the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,” and he was called “the friend of God.” See how a person is justified by works and not by faith alone. And in the same way, was not Rahab the har-lot also justified by works when she welcomed the messen-gers and sent them out by a different route? For just as a body without a spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.
Our faith in Christ must be rooted in love and like faith, love becomes real when it is acted upon.
The Greek language has at least three different words for love, though words that are very similar in meaning bring the list up to as many as six different words for love. While each of these understandings of love have their differences, there is much among them that is similar. Indeed, the love which Paul describes above is reflected in each of these words.
Eunomia implies the good feeling that one has toward neighbors, fellow countrymen and other with whom one has some societal bond. The word derives from the name of a Greek goddess of good order. She along with her sisters, peace and justice, provided for the stability of society.
Storge is more commonly translated as affection. It is a nurturing love but one that is instinctive. It is the affection that naturally rises between a parent and child. It is a love that that is characteristic of familial relationship.
Caritas implies an attitude of good will toward everyone. This attitude finds its expression in action done for the benefit of others. For example, “Mother Theresa had caritas for all humanity.” This type of love is associated with the performance of good works. The largest Catholic relief agency in the world is known as Caritas International.
While philia is similar to the English word “filial,” and can imply the love that exists between parent and child, its dominant use is to refer to friendship. So, for example, Philadelphia is known as the city of brotherly love. There is an intentional quality to philia that takes it beyond the instinctive affection that is natural to the child-parent relationship. It is a voluntary relationship that is rich and enduring. It can encompass love among siblings as well as close friends.
Eros is another expression of love which is like the English word “erotic” and implies a sexual component to the love relationship. This is the relationship characteristic of lovers and married couples. This is not separate from other forms of love but the sexual component adds its particular character and challenges to the relationship.
The most exalted type of love is agape. This usage is closely associated with the Christian tradition. The common understanding of the term agape comes almost directly from the canonical Gospels’ accounts of the teachings of Jesus. When asked what was the great commandment, Jesus said, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.” (Matthew 22:37-40).
Agapic love is an unconditional and self-sacrificing love that asks nothing in return. It is most closely associated with divinity. It is the love of Christ for humanity made manifest in his passion, death and resurrection. It is ideally our loving response to God, who first loved us. In 1 John 4:8 God is described as love, the word for love that is used in this verse is agape.