One of the core values of the Diocesan Pastoral Plan is forgiveness. Forgiveness is probably the most difficult thing Jesus asked of his disciples. It is not an easy thing to do because you are being asked to let go of what you perceive as righteous anger and indignation. You feel that you have justice and truth on your side. Your instinct is to argue for the justice of your position. Yet forgiveness asks you to focus less on the justice of your position and more on the relationship between you and the person who hurt you.
What are the limits of forgiveness? Take for example the recent case of Larry Nassar, the sports physician for the US Gymnastics team, who sexually molested over 130 girls and young women. Doesn’t forgiveness in this type of situation simply allow this sexual predator to continue to molest girls undeterred? The traditional response in this type of situation is to distinguish between the response of the victim and the response of society. The social institutions of a community have a responsibility to protect the community and to ensure justice within the community. It is not their role to be forgiving, only to provide for justice in the community. However, as the individual victims face their experience it may be beneficial for them to forgive the offender, not because he deserves it but because their anger continues to hold them as victims to this sexual predator. Once they forgive him and let go of the anger, he no longer has that emotional control over them. They are no longer victims, but survivors. They can go on with their lives. Meanwhile, the trial court judge sentenced Nassar to 175 years in prison, essentially a life sentence, to provide for justice in the community.
Forgiveness and justice do not rule out each other. Each has their proper role. Forgiveness allows the victim to find freedom from emotional control by the offender, while justice allows society to ensure that fairness is realized, and balance restored. Forgiveness is primarily a responsibility of the victim to himself or herself. Justice is a responsibility of society toward the victim and the greater community.
Over the centuries the people of the Northern Mariana Islands have experienced a great deal of injustice and suffering, as a people and individually. We can go back to the years of the Spanish colonization when the Chamorro people and culture were almost wiped out through disease and genocide. Under the Japanese the Chamorro and Carolinian communities were second class citizens on their own islands. World War II brought death and devastation to the islands. Ethnic tensions fueled by labor migration have been part of the scene for decades. Drug and alcohol abuse has added to the pain. Human frailty has produced infidelity, ruined marriages, crimes of passion and all types of broken relationships. I am aware of some conflicts between families that began with accidents, drunken behavior or other forms of stupidity that have festered for decades and cause enmity between families and torn apart villages and parishes in the process.
Some of this injustice and pain can never be resolved as it is too far in the past or the social institutions needed to deal with it simply do not exist. Some of it can be addressed by the institutions of this community, to the extent that they realize and honor their responsibility to justice and to the people of the Mariana Islands. Some of it is simply the responsibility of individuals to let go of past hurts and find the freedom that comes with forgiveness.
Thus, we can begin to see the importance of forgiveness as a core value for this Catholic community. We have spoken in the past of the importance of teamwork as a core value. Yet, teamwork is impossible if a community or parish is torn apart by past unforgiven hurts that continue to fester.
I will be the first to admit that forgiveness is not easy. There have been several times over the years where I felt that I or my family members have been treated unfairly and unjustly by others. Even understanding the importance of forgiveness both to the community and to my own emotional and spiritual well-being, I struggled with forgiveness. I could only achieve an intellectual forgiveness at first, an intention to forgive, but clinging to the emotional pain. Over time the anger has lessened, and my actions attempt to reflect forgiveness, but the emotional pain is still there even if it is not so intense. Yet, it is an important beginning. Forgiveness is a choice that I make, an act of the will. The feelings related to forgiveness may follow along later but the choice to forgive is an essential first step. As I am better able to forgive, my maturity as a Christian grows. I am more sensitive to others as well and less likely to cause them pain and place them in a position where they need to forgive me and let go of their own pain.
